The process of forgiveness

Forgiveness isn't easy, no doubt, but it is critical for our well being.  One of my favorite sayings on the subject is that "holding onto anger (or unforgiveness) is like drinking poison and expecting the other person to die".  What all too many people do not understand about forgiveness is twofold:

First and foremost, it does not mean what the person did was okay.

Secondly, it is often a process.  When you can say to yourself "I forgive this person for what they've done" and you know it is a lie in your heart, you have to keep saying it to yourself.  As time passes, your heart will start to soften and you'll start to actually feel forgiveness and lighter.

But if you do not forgive others their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins. - Matthew 6:15